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The Ludicrous Collection

By @Violetmeyers

Ha! Hero?

“So you’re not who I think you are?” Jerry asked again. 

I laughed at him, “I’m tellin’ ya, it all depends on who you think I am.”

“I was told that you were a really smart kid. Got straight A’s.”

“Nah, I cheated every year. No one ever caught me. I guess I was too good at being awesome.” I leaned back in my chair and rested my hands behind my head. 

“Most handsome kid in the school,” Jerry said. 

I smirked, “I can’t control that, that’s one thing that’s true about me.” 

“Yeah…” he grumbled. “You became the best student body officer. What about that?” 

“My sister was the one with all the ideas she wanted to be SBO as well,” I shrugged, “stole them from her but made them better.”

His jaw dropped. “There has to be something about you that’s true! What about the big story?” 

“What big story?”

“The story about how you saved that girl from the gorilla attack! You jumped into the gorilla cage and punched it in the face knocking it out! The girl dropped her phone in there and stupidly went to retrieve it. She fell in. But to her luck you were there with your super human strength.” He punched the air. 

I laughed so hard I almost fell off my chair, “people believed that?” 

Jerry nodded vigorously. 

I shook my head in disbelief, “that was a dream I had. I told it to Bucky and I guess the word spread. I never saved anyone. And I’m not strong, like, at all. But I wish I was. Man, it’d be freakin’ awesome if I could punch a gorilla.” 

Jerry put his notebook down and stared at me. 

“What?” I asked him. 

“You’re just a big liar,” he shook his head as he stood up to leave.  

“What?” I asked him, “I didn’t lie about anything! I wasn’t the one who made up those crazy stories.” 

“But you didn’t correct them either. I’m done here. Clearly you’re a fraud.” 

“Yeah, whatever. I need to get back to my work anyway.”

“What,” he said, “the work that’s probably a lie too? David, I looked up to you. I couldn’t wait for the day that I’d meet the great David Monterily. But it looks like everything I’ve ever learned about you is a lie.” He shook his head, “I can’t believe I ever wanted to be like you.” And then he left. 

This kid, Larry, somehow managed to find my house and pelted me with questions. He seemed too eager and excited to see me, seemed like the perfect opportunity to disappoint him. He thought I was some all time hero. I couldn’t let that be my life! I had a reputation to build. And let me tell ya, it wasn’t being a hero. I had no idea how this kid could ever think I was a<em style=

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