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Underhanded Graduate

By @ObsidianLightX3


I yelped, stumbling and lifting a hand up to gingerly test the place the whiteboard just hit me. The board clattered to the floor and there was the sound of rushed footsteps. I glanced down the hall and saw an innocent young lady rushing to grab the board, her expression quite distressed. About ten feet being her was another girl, this one obviously older than the first, and she was laughing like a madman.

The younger one took the whiteboard and clutched it to her chest, then stared up at me. Her mouth moved as though she were going to squeak or yelp, but nothing came out. The laughing girl came over, wiping away nonexistent tears.

“Oh, do I love messing with the helpless ones,” she said in what was probably the most heartless way possible.

I narrowed my eyes, “Excuse me?”

The young girl scrambled to stand behind me, scribbling on her whiteboard. The one laughing finally calms down.

“Ah – I mean just what I said. Poor Teiko here is mute, so she has to, well, you know, write to communicate.”

Teiko held up her whiteboard, a pout on her face. Shut up, Kokichi!

I turn to the girl known at Kokichi, “Hey, why don’t you just leave the poor girl alone?”

“Um, because I like picking on her?” she said it as though it were obvious.

Teiko continued to scrawl on the board, Why don’t you go find someone else to pick on?!?!

Kokichi puffs out her cheeks, “Ugh, you’re no fun.” She waved her hand, “Fine, I’ll go. Geez. But, I may as well introduce myself before I go.” She bat her eyes. “I’m Kokichi, Ultimate Supreme Leader.” She balls her fists, making a gesture as though she were fist pumping with both arms.

I raised an eyebrow. “I’m not sure that’s even a thing.”

“Well, it is, because I am,” she placed a hand on her chest, grinning. “So what about you? Are you the Ultimate Stands Up For Idiots?”

I rolled my eyes, ready to snap this girl’s neck already. “No. I’m Eliza, the Ultimate Actress.”

“Oh~ actress?” she clasped her hands together. “Show me a play!”

“Um, it’s not that simple–”

“Act for me!” she yells. “Pretend you’re a dog!”

I raised an eyebrow, “I’m not going to–”

Teiko shoved her whiteboard in Kokichi’s face. Kokichi’s eyebrows furrowed and she looked annoyed for a moment, then she put on a smile and gazed at me. I attempted to get a glance at what had been written, but Teiko had already wiped her sleeve across the surface.

Kokichi turned and walked down the hall, I turned to Teiko. “What did you tell her?”

It doesn’t matter, she wrote with a small smile. She’s gone. Thanks for helping me out.

“Of course! So, what’s your Ultimate?” Ultimate Cutie? Is that a thing?

She wrote with a very proud smile planted on her face, Ultimate Florist! I know every flower that exists, the history, and can predict the possible future of their existence!

I blinked, “That’s impressive. I know a bunch of dirty puns you can use with tulips.”

She tilted her head, looking confused. Dirty puns? Like, dirty because they involve dirt?

I laughed, “Yeah, let’s go with that.”

Teiko began writing something else, but paused when a little girl screamed in the kitchen. We rushed inside, hearing a crash. My first thought was, Has somebody already been killed?

In the restaurant, people were crowding around the kitchen door in confusion. I pushed through, managing to get a good look inside.

Angen was standing by the fridge, looking down at Camu, who was writhing around on the ground. Looks like he slipped in a puddle or something, the scene forcing me to hold in a laugh. Others around me didn’t seem to care, so they burst into laughter.

I practically jumped when I realized Kuri and Maya were next to me, Kuri laughing his *** off while Maya gave a slight worried look. She then glanced at Kuri and forced a quiet laugh.

Meanwhile, Camu had tears in his eyes, “My leg! I think I broke it!”

Tadashi pushed through some people and kelt next to Camu, followed by Higu. The two locked eyes and sneered at each other, before both turning their attention back to Camu.

Higu examined him, “Which one?”

“The left one!” he cried.

She touched the crippled leg gingerly and he almost backhanded her face. She flinched away quickly, managing to stay just out of reach.

“Uh, sorry,” he muttered.

Tadashi didn’t look very amused. He scoffed and stood up. “We’ll help you to the nurse’s office.” Higu stood as well, and with the two together, I realized just how short Higu is. She’s shorter than Aino and London, who probably have a good foot or so on her.

Tadashi helped Camu up, the weeb putting his arms around each of his helpers’ shoulders. The small crowd separated for the three, and they went out into the hallway.

Next to me, I hear London snort, “His scream sounded like a girl.”

Teiko, standing by London, looked as though she were giggling but there wasn’t any sound.

I head off back into the hallway and down to the garden. There was a sign next to the double doors that would lead out there that says Garden of Judgement. I honestly had no clue as to why they called it that or who was being judged. I could only shrug and keep going.

I pushed through the doors and walked into the circle of beauty. Well, more of a square. The school building stood around the garden in a square, in the middle sat a granate fountain full of circulating water. A stone path wrapped around the base of the fountain and broke off into four different straightaways, each leading to a set of double doors into the building. Beyond the stone, was mostly gr***, bushes, flowers, even a few trees. It was truly a nice place to relax.

I walked down the stone path before taking a detour and sitting between a rose bush and an empty one. I sat there with my legs crossed for a long moment, stiffening when I heard doors opening and a female voice I didn’t recognize.

“… So funny!” a girl exclaimed.

Then, what surprised me even more, was hearing Kuriama reply, “Oh, stop it, Maya.”

I peeked over the rose bush and saw the two walking into the garden. Maya’s heels clacked on the stone pathway until they stopped in the middle. Maya batted her eyes at Kuri, who looked very proud of himself.

“So,” Maya said, “my room again?”

Kuri nodded, “Sounds like a plan.”

My heart pierced and shattered so loud, I’m surprised they didn’t hear it.

I slumped down, making sure as to not make any noise. Their voices didn’t ring again, and I heard Maya’s footsteps all the way to the other side of the garden, before a set of double doors was opened.

When the doors swang closed, I stood up sadly. With a sigh, I went over to the path and went through the doors opposite Kuri and Maya.

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