The Crimson Pitcher

By @Alexanderr2473

The Crimson Pitcher

By @Alexanderr2473

Chapter 1

Contest

I was so excited. The day I turned 18 was the day I was finally out of my parents’ grasp. There was nothing that could hold me back from doing whatever I wanted. Except for food, clothes, shelter, and my college tuition of course. But aside from those minor details, all bets were off. I had been counting down the days, minutes, and hours until I could finally get this tattoo. I had fantasized about it since I had been 14 on that fateful day when I had been watching c-span and the commercial came on. I still remember it like it was yesterday. The kids were running along with glee, the sun was out, everything was just perfect. That is, until little Jimmy felt some fatigue. He was parched, and so how ever were the kids to continue their precious game of tag? At this point grief and despair began to set in my brain as I realized that this very well may be the end of the winsome summer days as we knew them. But, then, just suddenly, a great powerful being bursted through the brick wall. And when all the smoke had cleared, all the kids looked up and realized. It was him. The being who was going to return the summertime bliss to them just as quickly as they had been robbed of it. He reared back and roared his powerful phrase that rung through the streets as if someone had knelled the liberty bell in Philadelphia. Those kids drank the nectar of the Kool-Aid-Man and never again did they long for drink. “Oh Yeah!” Became the phrase that echoed in my mind from that point on. Whenever an opportunity would present itself, though I often wasn’t outgoing, I would respond with a resounding “Oh Yeah”. That day, I decided that I wanted to have this majestic, crimson, larger-than-life being permanently tattooed onto my body. I wanted people to see that he was imprinted onto my body just as he was engrained into my mind. A symbol of hope for the people, is what I thought everybody would perceive it as. My mind had been made up despite the countless “Oh no!” Jokes made by my peers. So on April 3rd, 2020, I sauntered over to the tattoo parlor on Adams Street. I waited my turn and when I sat in the chair I showed the artist what I wanted with a grin that stretched from ear to ear. He somehow managed to muffle a giggle and got to work on my arm. When he finished I ran home and replayed the commercial until I fell asleep. When I woke up I removed the bandages and there it was: a picture of the crimson pitcher. I was finally going to have courage in the face of adversity for my idol was forever with me. I had a late birthday so I had just started college at that time. A few days after my tattoo day I went to a lecture and I saw one of my friends, Vincent, there. I hadn’t shown many people my tattoo because they just wouldn’t get it, and he was no exception. When we had said hello’s, he informed me that his dog, which he’d had for around a decade, had passed. I personally tried to give him my condolences, but something under my sleeve said otherwise. To put it into perspective, the conversation went something like this: “Hey Vin, how you doing man?”, “Ah, not too well, my dog Cheerio just passed away”, a silent awkward pause, and a muffled “Oh yeah!”. Needless to say, Vincent no longer prefers the title of ‘friend’ anymore. After the lecture I went home and on my drive, I guess one of my taillights had been out, I was speeding a little, and since I hadn’t brought my glasses, it seemed as though I was swerving a little; nothing major though. I was pulled over by a police officer who asked me if I had been drinking that evening. Obviously I hadn’t, and I tried to articulate that but from beneath my sleeve came a greatly affirming “oh yeah”. Needless to say, another awkward situation had presented itself, and what was I to do? At that point, it dawned on me that my tattoo had given me a superpower: to make things super awkward at the speed of light! Basically, my personality had taken steroids and manifested itself onto my arm in the form of a Kool-Aid-Man tattoo. Looking back on it, the best time to have articulated this thought probably wasn’t right after having been accused of drinking by a police officer, but that’s the way things played out. Long story short, my dad was not happy about bailing me out with the only excuse being that a tattoo that I wasn’t supposed to have gotten had suddenly come alive. My world had shattered. Something that I once relished I now reviled. I thought that the Kool-Aid-Man had been a saving grace but instead he began to haunt me everywhere I went. The moral of the story here is be careful what you wish for, and always, ALWAYS listen to your parents.

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