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Jealous Thoughts

By @Joyous_One

Thursday, July 9,2015 10:42 PM

Creaking steps down the halls

With fingers brushing the soft walls

Looking up and shaking my head

While putting my hands to either side of my head

I ask myself why think this way

As women live with him I wonder

But I know I don’t need to

With them girls knowing his space

As I am states away

It grabs me, it taunts me

But I love them as I love him

How come them thoughts flutter though

Why do I think this way

As they are there

In his room,the only room

For this pass month he’d lay on the floor

With them girls in his bed

Now they buy things together

Making decisions with one another

A futon is placed for them

As of now he’s sleeping in his queen size bed

Perhaps it helps my thoughts

Until the younger one goes to sleep else where for the night

Leaving the oldest alone with him for the night

As I think I shake my head

There’s nothing to worry about

Even when they get more of him than me

Hugs through their nightmares as I ache for his touch

There’s nothing there but my longing for him

Just them girls have me envious of the attention I can’t get

It’s okay as I am coming back

For him and I

Perhaps I won’t be as envious

I believe not

It’s just the distance , driving me mad

As they lay within his home

Getting help as they deserve

I love them and they deserve the world

I fell horrible for feeling odd of there stay after four weeks

Then months came rolling through

As I said I am envious of the attention I can’t receive

But I am slowly not caring and not worrying

For I love them

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