Elven Warrior

Dear elven warrior,

If I was a star I think I would die

from the suffocating loneliness

of space

No one would notice

my suffering

until I am long gone;

but then,

how is that any different from being human?

I love you; I hate you;

I fear you; I need you

-aren’t they all the same?

Elven warrior

I’m wasting my time

watching people expend energy

through emotions

I guess apathetics live the longest.

I’m apathetic with only one “a”

A star burning silently

miles away

All that I try to say

lost in the endless radio static of space.

The crackles absorb my tears

my useless expense of energy.

We use stars to guide our way

the Schrödinger’s cat of a compass

pinning your hope

on a faraway star

a star which probably died

a long time ago.

I pin my hope on you

my star, my elven warrior,

but I haven’t seen you in a while.

The clouds

omit our interactions.

You could have died weeks ago.

I’m lost without you

elven warrior,

I need your light.

But the only signs

are dim flickers

from behind the fog

the only indication you’re still alive.

Elven warrior,

you are a shooting star

I can only watch helplessly

as you fall

My ability to help you

is stolen by the static abyss of space.

Elven warrior.

I am still here.

I

am

still

here

A pinprick of light

A smooth rock in the rough patch

A so-called

saving grace.

I want to find safety with you

if you will

let me.

Allow me to find you

Even if

it means I

lose myself in the process.

Elven warrior.

Do you hear me?

It’s been a long time since we talked.

Elven warrior.

I think I might be

burning out.

Do not mourn,

elven warrior.

Even the sun dies eventually.

Elven warrior

it’s lonely out here

abandoned in the radio static.

I’m burning out, elven warrior

I’m

burning