The smile leaves your face as soon as you exit the school. You tell your mom school was good. Could you recall what happened in first period? Or seventh? You just tell your mom nothing eventful happened. The school days all blur together anyway.
You lay in your bed, staring up at your ceiling, music is playing but you couldn’t say what was on for the life of you. The yelling gets louder than yesterday’s, but it doesn’t bother you. It hasn’t bothered you for years now.
You stare at the therapist blankly, their words not even entering your brain. This behavior is normal for you, so you don’t get why you have to sit there.
An alarm goes off somewhere in the house, waking you up. After it’s obvious you won’t be falling back asleep, you check your phone. New snapchat notifications, if a person saw them, they’d believe you were popular. You shut your phone off, what was the point of checking them? You already know they were just streaks. When was the last you had an actual conversation with any of those people? Sometimes you think of ending your streaks, but that would be a change.
During quarantine, everything is just one big day. Nothing really mattered anymore. The world was practically ending and they wanted homework done. You just slept all day.
You start your assignments the hour before they’re due. No time put into them. No effort. No knowledge gained.
You went on a Netflix binge. Some new show that was everywhere and everyone recommends. The end credits are rolling, and you can’t recall a single detail.
You bump into someone you once knew. They asked where you’ve been and what you enjoyed doing now. You’re mind slowly travels back in time. Where have you been? You rarely leave home anymore. And what did you do to fill you time anymore? Enjoyment was a world that fell from your vocabulary. They snap their fingers and laugh, “A little detached from the world?” You slowly blink at them, “right.” More than they could ever know.