The urge of death held back
The words from my past still haunt my mind, no matter how far I go I can never truly escape it. I tried moving forward, but I’m always dragged back to where I started. I ask myself why don’t I just leave this horrid world? This world has nothing for me to look forward to but every time I have that kind of thought an idiot comes to mind. If I hadn’t met him, I’m sure I would be dead. Sam Renderson is the reason I’m still alive. I’m sure if I killed myself he would blame himself, I can’t die with that on my conscience. “What an idiot,” I say under my breath as the light from my eyes fade into nothing except darkness.
I wake up to the unpleasant sound of screams. It’s always so hectic in the mornings due to the twins preparing to leave for school. They were adorable, at first, but now they’re a pain in my **** bottom. Not trying to sound ungrateful for what they have done for me these past few years, but they’re like dogs, always following someone. It’s cute, but also annoying when you just want to be alone. On the other hand, they’ve helped me a lot when I was down in the dumps.
“Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” Emma says while mocking the bags under my eyes from having an irregular sleeping schedule.
“Your cold aura is showing Keith. You might want to keep it under wraps before we tell mom your lying to her about being fine,” Ethen pitches in with some threatening.
I reply with a stern voice “Remember the last time both of you threatened me, do you need a quick reminder of the cold sensation that made your backs shiver, the one that made you kneel on your knees while begging me to stop.” I admit I pasted the line that first time, they were only kids, and they still are. I guess since I feel close to them I don’t try to act nice like how I am with other people.
Emma has the gift of temperature and Ethen has the gift of color. Emma can feel different temperatures surrounding the person next to her, she says it’s almost like she can see an aura. For example, an angry person will be cold; a happy person will feel warm. She says that the distance is based on each person, they were always different some feeling spiky others feeling smooth. Ethen’s ability has very little to do with distance. His eyes are the most important factor and how far he can see. He said it was different based on the person, each person would have a different patterning around them and that they never changed, as for the color it would change but he doesn’t know what makes the colors change. My guess is that the twins’ abilities are connected to some extent, I mean the information connects there’s no denying that, the aura feeling different ways on Emma’s side and the different patterning’s on Ethen’s side of the story. I haven’t told any of my hypothesis to anyone, not even them, I just don’t want to be wrong and cause a commotion I especially don’t want to be a nuisance to Ms. Renderson.
She’s a very important person to me, it’s such a shame she has to work so hard. Life is cruel and unfair, the people who deserve happiness never get it and the lowlife ******** always get what they desire, it’s disgusting. I remember the first time I met her, it felt like heaven and hell had stopped fighting just to illuminate her. She was wearing a cherry red dress that matched with her glowing red lips that looked like blood stained glass.
“Man, that reminded me of the old days,” I say out loud subconsciously.
“What,” Sam asks me looking a bit concerned.
I feel like telling him it was nothing but, I know that’s just going to worry him more. He knows my habits. He likes to remind me that he knows me better then I know myself. I’m glad to have a friend like that, but I feel like I depend on him too much for my own good.
“A nostalgic feeling just filled my thoughts of the first time I met your mom. She was so beautiful that it broke my little brain back then,” I tell him.
He quickly replies with a stern,” she’s our mom, not just mine. When will it get through your thick skull that you’re like a brother to me and that our mom sees you as a son. Listen I know you have been through some tough **** but I’m here with you, just talk to me about it if you’re still dealing with it.”
“Thanks for being here for me,” I say with a gentle simile. “Now let’s get on our way to school, I don’t want to be the one that’s know to be late on the first day. I just plain don’t want to be known as anything except for boring Keith.”
“No one thinks your boring. People think your emo and a gang leader because of all the fights you get into. Everyone still wonders how you got into this school. You might not look like it but I know for a fact that you’re a huge nerd Detective Henderson,” he teases as we head for Verona High school of the elite academic forces.