Big L

By @Kasia_Niee

Chapter 1

Big L

Big L

Ka had a wonderful day today. In fact, last couple of years were pretty great – moving to a lovely city, getting a beautiful apartment, starting a job she always dreamed of and doing cool things with the love of her life – L. She could have never expected that her life would look like that. Not after everything she got through. When Ka met L she was just in a middle of her twenties. She was shy and very insecure back then. Ka couldn’t believe that someone could appreciate her so much especially after getting to know her so well. She was not an easy one to deal with. Stubborn, depressive, heavy and difficult. She was always told that if she would ever like to be with someone she needs to change into beautiful, subtle, slim and understanding girl. The pressure was especially placed on the understanding part. Ka had to understand that men are there to take care of them, to help them and support them. Ka had to understand that those poor ************* are very weak and you need to forgive them their weaknesses and slips. If she will be too hard on them – none of them will stay. Not for long anyway. Ka was also told that her expectations towards men too high – apparently she had an impossible brief. When L came along Ka was at the point of quitting all of the men so she didn’t care much. She was absolutely herself – hard, difficult and definitely not subtle. And far away from being slim and beautiful. Somehow L didn’t want to let go. She ignored L constantly and was getting involved with some men, but L was very patient and was not giving up on her. Ka has never seen such a persistence. She was very impressed. Although not everything was perfect. Ka’s friends didn’t like L. She introduced L to everyone, she was taking him to the parties and family and friends events. Hardly anyone liked L. Ka was receiving a pity look – “ow she is here again with L..poor her”. It made her stop attending most of the parties as she felt like her choice is not accepted. But anyway – today she turned 40. L took her for a lovely dinner and later in the eve they were having a cozy evening with a bottle of Sauvignon blanc (Ka’s favorite). Ka was at peace. She felt very safe. When L fell asleep, Ka went to the kitchen to make herself a tea. The kettle was on, she stood there for a couple of minutes and took a glance at a birthday postcard from L. Ka read it out with a quiet voice:

Thank you for existing my love.

I knew from the very beginning that we were meant for each other.

Yours forever,

Loneliness”.

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