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I’m at war with myself
it’s a constant never ending battle
part of me feels worthless
unwanted
useless
but part of me wants to be happy
to keep smiling and laughing
like I used to
Part of me wants to just give up
To just cry all the time
More than I already do
My two sides are at a constant war
“You suck go away”
“they like you don’t worry its okay”
“you’re so ugly; one good hair day won’t save you”
“they like you, don’t listen”
I can’t explain it
because it is so constant
and its making my head hurt
I cant relate to anyone
I just want it to stop
I’m not getting better; only worse
My bad side is taking over my mind
I’m not as happy as I was
I hate being alone
because that means alone with my thoughts
and usually that’s worse than being alone with a killer
when I’m alone it ends in tears and thoughts I cant get rid of
its the time for my dark side to shine
but when I’m with people
I can’t help but think they don’t like me
they hate me
they’re faking it
its like I can’t escape
myself
I wish it could end
I’m tired of feeling like this
I’m tired of being at war with myself
I’m tired of not having anyone to talk to
I’m just tired of all of it
Of being at war with myself
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