The awfulest day of my life began with what some people call «a funny story», but for me it wasn’t funny at all. I woke up later than I had to, so when I saw the time on my ringing clocks, I said a very bad word and attempted leaving my bed quickly. I failed and fell on the tough floor, almost breaking a rib (at least, so I felt). Then I said a bad word twice and got on my feet.
I never liked the kitchen. I thought it was always kidding me! While I was trying to turn on the coffee machine, it glitched and left me without coffee at all. As I had no time for breakfast, I started dealing with a shirt, but when I was ironing, the coffee machine turned on and made a late for me (how sweet) right onto an empty platform. I forgot about an iron and left it on the shirt as I wanted to wipe my totally wet kitchen table, so when I returned to the shirt, it was burned almost into ash. That morning, I hoped that my boss likes red T-shirts with Angry Birds on their front.
When I was almost ready to leave, my dog appeared suddenly from the shadow and said that he wanted to go for a walk. I felt guilty for that, but I wished I didn’t have a dog. At last, I decided to leave Bill for my friend’s care (he always sais that he’s glad to help me), so I grabbed the dog and ran outside. Bill was so happy about morning walk that he picked up his favorite ball and started to jump on me with it like that annoying guy from Oriflame. I was bearing it strongly during all our way. But suddenly Bill decided to chew the ball, but he failed picking it again, so the ball fell on the road. I felt the pain before it came. I didn’t even had time to shout «No!» or «Stop!». While Bill was running to the ball, I collided with a tree. Nice blue and white stars began dancing around me… I liked them, though.
When I managed the walk with Bill and left him in my friend’s yard, I hurried to the office I work in.
«Is old man here?» I whispered to my mate James as I arrived.
«Yes» he said. «And he already wants you fired».
Actually, I thought that a little conversation with my boss will pass and started working with the Impire-State-Building-of-paper on my table. That stack of **** documents obviuosly was left by somebody who really hates me. As I was finishing the half of it, my boss saw me and wanted to have a talk with me. It wasn’t pleasant at all, and after it I felt like boiled goose: stupid and angry and miserable.
«Tomorrow you’re here at seven» said the boss, burning down the remnants of my mood.
«But tomorrow’s Saturday!» I protested, but the boss had already gone.
It was deep evening when I left the office and went home. As I was going up the steps, I recalled that I didn’t returned Bill from my friend, so I walked back to him and, without meeting my friend’s angry glance, took Bill and went home again. It seemed to be rainy weather during the day, so a bit of water left on the road beside my way. I was too tired and weary to think about cars and their drivers, but I’ve never thought they can be so rude. Of course, one car moved exactly into dirty water, and a fountain of it splashed onto me, making me almost soaked through. Bill was happy about it, but I returned home without any hope of goodness.
When I thought the day couldn’t come worse, it did. Suddenly my phone rang, and I saw a note that I made yesterday: «Meet Jane in an hour. Don’t forget the flowers».
«Oh my God!» I shouted, shocked by such trick of my poor fate. I had to meet my girlfriend that day, and I totally forgot about it.
I started running across the house, trying to find the best trousers, best tie, best shirt. Actually, it was the best one that I burned in the morning, but I surely couldn’t go to a restaurant in the red T-shirt with Angry Birds. Bill worried about my rush, so he tried to slow me several times, almost tearing my coat. When I fought him at last and gave him his supper, I ran quickly out my home and hurried to the place me and Jane were supposed to meet in. I was almost late because of those hellborn flowers, but I thanked women’s tradition to be late when they are to meet their boyfriends.
I was too anxious to think about anything but her beauty. Jane was gorgeous and very interesting, and I hoped to marry her soon, but how could I manage it if I forgot about the meeting? Well, the evening had to be nice, because Jane went in the amazing red dress that I had never seen her wearing, so I decided it might be for me. I stared at her, unable to say anything at all, but she looked unconcerned about it. I wanted to order wine and some food, but she stopped me. I didn’t really care: maybe, she just wasn’t hugry. I was looking at her like an absolute idiot, fallen in love with her beautiful blue eyes and soft skin, the perfect shape of her body and her interesting character, and…
«Mike,» she said, interrupting my thoughts, «we need to have a talk».
Anything you want, darling, I thought, but then forced myself to be attentive.
«About what?» I asked.
She waited a minute or two, glancing on me and on the table and in the window, then said «I leave you».
I stared at her, my eyes almost on my forehead, mouth open.
«Wh… What? Why?» I tried to say something, but words drown inside my throat.
«Sorry, Mike, you’re good guy, and I hope you’ll find someone, but I don’t want to be with you anymore» said Jane as she was rising fron her place and leaving me alone at the table, with my hands in front of me, staring at nothing.
What an awful day can an ordinary human bear? Actually, a really awful one. I don’t remember what I was thinking about when I was going home, but I was trying not to think about Jane, or boss, or probably broken rib. The streets were too dark that evening, covered with wet fog, and I suddenly felt hopelessly lonely and unhappy. I was the looser, I always knew that, but, Saints, why should I bear all of that?!
I saw a green walking human above the crossroad and hurried up, because I didn’t want to wait another minute being absolutely betrayed by the reality. People were almost on the opposite side of the road, when a car collided with them. I didn’t even bother myself to watch around, to check the road before crossing, and I saw the car only when it moved exactly in front of me, crashing the crowd. I jumped back, loosing the balance, watching people dying beneath the car’s wheels. They were screaming and crying, some of other watchers were already weeping. I fell on the ground, then tried to turn away from the horrible bloody picture and got on my feet, almost falling again beside the street lantert, but I grabbed it with my right hand in the last moment. I heard screams, moaning sirens and shouting behind me. I stood there, beneath the streetlight, hugging it, breathing so deeply and rapidly that the world around me began to whirl, my heart rattling in my chest, blood pounding in my ears. The car was moving in my eyes again and again, avoiding me, but crashing the people on the amazingly high speed.
It was the luckiest day in my life.